


In Circles

by yourinsomnia



Category: Warchild Series - Karin Lowachee
Genre: AU, Angst, M/M, POV First Person, tattoo worship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-12-14
Updated: 2013-12-14
Packaged: 2018-01-04 15:24:04
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,679
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1082624
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yourinsomnia/pseuds/yourinsomnia
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Niko takes Jos down to the sea.</p>
            </blockquote>





	In Circles

**Author's Note:**

> When Niko returns to Aaian-na, he asks Jos to come back with him and Jos agrees for whatever unfathomable reason you can think of. 
> 
> (Although according to a tumblr update this might not be so terribly AU after all!)
> 
> Also, I have no idea if hoverbikes exist in the Warchild Universe but the image of Niko and Jos on a bike was just too sexy to resist.

 

We were surrounded by the sea on all sides. The green of hilltops spilled into the blue of the water, and the blue of the water flowed into the white of the clouds; all this and every other color illuminated by the red rays of summer sun.

 

“Niko, let’s stop here.” I placed one hand on his shoulder, in case he didn’t quite hear me over the monotonous roar of the hoverbike. My other hand remained firmly on his waist.

 

I asked him to take me to the sea the day before. He said ‘yes’, not looking at me; his gaze lingering in the direction of his mother’s quarters instead.

 

We left early in the morning but by afternoon it seemed as though we had not gotten any closer to our destination. Considering the intricate map on the dash, I suspected we were getting lost on purpose. Or perhaps going somewhere else entirely.

 

Niko steered the bike towards a clearing, the engines dying off with a precipitous echo at his command for a shutdown. We got off and climbed a small hill until we made it atop a flat stable surface, the view revealing itself, unobstructed now by neither movement nor trees.  Despite the singing of birds, and an almost imperceptible sound of waves in the distance, everything seemed silent. A hologram that would dissolve if I touched it.

 

I stretched out my hand, grasping for air, and felt the wind caress my skin.

 

If I spent years on a planet, would any of this become more real?

 

Niko stood close to me, the hood of his light-blue robe hiding his face from me. He had advised me to wear something that would shield from the sun but I had not listened to him. Instead I wore a white shirt and black pants that I was holding on to from _Macedon_. The sun was burning holes on my face and hands.

 

***

 

Not long after we resumed our descent,  we came upon a settlement. A dozen or so white houses with big rooftops and terraces, protruding from the mountain as though carved from stone itself. Beneath the buildings an open space with a garden - flowers in blinding colors, decorative trees, and a creek winding down beyond the garden to the nearest drop.

 

The only people we’ve encountered were two _striviirc-na_ kids running around in the garden, who stopped to look at us, paying special reverence to Niko.  

 

He led me to a house with red-rimmed windows, the tangled markings of _striivirca-na_ patterns fading into the chalk-white texture of the walls.

 

“What are we doing here?” I asked before we had a chance to step through the door.

 

“We are getting food,” Niko answered.

 

After walking up a long flight of corroded stone steps, a young woman greeted us casually at the door, as though she had expected us in that precise moment of time. Not striivirc-na, but black eyes and pale, pigmented skin all the same.

 

She laid out a table of food for us in one of the top terraces and disappeared behind the curtains, promising to come back with tea.

 

Me and Niko sat quietly. It hasn’t been more than a week since I was back on Aaian-na, and yet the silence reminded me of something so long forgotten it had stopped being memory and became myth - the evenings with Niko as my silent companion, when we painted on the balcony against the backdrop of horizon and sea.

 

Can you really regain things you thought you had lost?

 

It couldn’t be that easy. And it wasn’t. I knew that.

 

_“Go to your jets,” he says. “But remind them you are mine.”_

_He would kill them, now, if they hurt me._

_“Niko,” I tell him, “I’m not yours.”_

 

Niko must have realized I was recalling something unpleasant because he sat there, still as stone, his eyes focused heavily on me.

 

The woman came back with cups and a pot of tea.

 

Her name was Ailandra-na. The name fit her and she fit this place.

 

This place, with Niko next to her. 

 

It was the way her features softened when she looked at Niko. And the way the corners of her lips tipped upwards in this small, knowing smile when he spoke. It made my stomach coil in a feeling that I didn’t think had a name. Or not one that I’ve used before.

 

They talked about his affairs and the peace talks. She asked after Enas S’tlian-dan. Niko hesitated for just a split second but his tone remained even. “She stays in her room a lot.”

 

I didn’t want to think about any of this now.

 

I looked out towards the sea, imagining everything a mirage.

 

***

 

After finishing the meal, I excused myself and went outside. Niko said he would follow me soon.  

 

I stood under a shade of a tree, waiting for the afternoon heat to melt the world into a dream.

 

The children who looked openly at us before, did not pay attention to me now. They were playing a game.

 

From what I could tell, it involved throwing a small ball so that it bounced off the ground a few times, and then hit a designated circled on a wall. The boy, who seemed older, was really good, but the girl’s wings kept fluttering in exasperation over having her ball miss the circle by a scratch.

 

“Can I try?” I asked them as I approached.

 

They looked at me for some time but passed the ball. I hit it really hard, thinking it would facilitate more bounces and therefore more precision, but instead, the ball rebound only once, hit the wall with a violent thud, and upon missing the circle entirely, flew off into the bushes.

 

The girl looked at me in dismay and trotted off in that direction. I followed her.

 

We emerged later with her on my shoulders, pulling on my hair.

  
“Your hair is so soft!”

 

“Is it.” I put her down but held on to the ball we’ve recovered through our painstaking efforts. “Can I try again?” I asked.

 

“No!” The boy snatched the ball from my hands. “You are horrible at this.”

 

“I think I am alright. If only I get another try.”

 

“How about this then,” he was looking at something behind me. “I will let you try. But if you don’t score perfectly in three games out of five, you ask the _kia'redan bae_ to give us a ride.”

 

I turned around to where he was looking. Niko stood by the hoverbike, speaking to Ailandra-na.

 

***

 

I came up to Niko, the children trailing after me. “I lost,” I told him.

 

“I saw,” he said, with a hint of amusement in his voice. “I would feel disappointed in my student if I hadn’t noticed how pitiful that last attempt was. Too pitiful.”

 

“Shhh...” I said and smiled.

 

***

 

“Well, this is certainly a sight,” Ailandra-na said, watching Niko, who was making peaceful circles around the garden with the kids.

 

We were sitting on her terrace again, sipping cooled tea.

 

“Nikolas-dan said you two were on the way to the beach.” She looked at me this time.

 

“Yes,” I replied.

 

“How delightful! There is a storm coming.” Her tone was so flat in _ka’hide_ , it could only be interpreted as mocking.

 

“A storm?”

 

“Yes. Tomorrow though. Tonight it will be warm and breezy.” She smiled. “Such a perfect night for to be alone with someone.”

 

I felt slightly lightheaded and put my cup down.

 

Ailandra-na laughed airily. “I’ve unsettled you. So I was wrong. You and Niko are not in that kind of relationship.”

 

And continued to look at me as though she had discovered the most amusing thing in the world.

 

***

 

When Niko finished his riding rounds, I was already waiting for him in the garden.

 

He didn’t go to see Ailandra-na before we left. They must have said their goodbyes already.

 

By the time we took off, the day’s scale had tipped towards evening. The sun was still out, bright and hot as ever, but I had a feeling there wasn’t much time before it set. I wondered if we would make it back before dark. Or if we would have to spend the night outside somewhere. But I didn’t ask.

 

Instead I pressed my lips to Niko’s ear and whispered  -

 

“Thank you.”

 

I felt his body go tense beneath my hands.  

 

For giving a ride to those kids. For bringing me here. But I think Niko understood, because he turned around to face me and nodded.

 

***

There was no one except us on the beach.

 

But there was everything else: Sand the color of blood set on fire, hot but soothing once you burrowed deeper with your feet; birds with black stripes dipping in and out of the blazing blue of the waves; and the thundering noise of the water colliding with ground.

 

“This is beautiful,” I thought and probably said out loud. Niko smiled, a genuine smile that was unexpected for both of us.

 

We stood with our feet in the water. It seemed so cold at first, it burned. Niko told me it would get better and he was right. Although I couldn’t tell if my senses were numbed from the pleasure or the cold.

 

The waves beat against my ankles but I dared not to step further.

 

“There is should be a place nearby with rocks breaking up the waves. It will be more quiet - you can try swimming,” Niko said.

 

“No. I like the unquiet.”

 

***

 

Niko went swimming while I stayed ashore. The experience of sitting on the sand and watching the sun slowly spiral downward was paralyzing, trapping the air in my lungs and making it hard to breathe.

 

When Niko came back, his breathing was quick and hard too.

  
He lied down next to me and closed his eyes. The red glow of the sky reflected at me from his skin. I didn’t care for the sunset anymore, because he was here now and I’ve never had a chance to look at him like this.

 

I leaned over and cast away a lock of hair drenched in water and sand from his forehead. His eyes fluttered open and he looked at me.

 

I couldn’t focus on anything but his tattoo.

 

Just like the time on _Tulundrla_ , I reached out to trace it by where it began by his temples. I knew it covered his whole body, from his face to his toes, although I could not see it beyond the wet pants that clung to his skin.

 

I began to draw the circles and the swirls of the pattern with the tips of my fingers. I traced it down his face, cutting across the cheeks and jaw, a contrast of soft skin against bone, and held his chin up to keep contact as it curved down his neck.

 

I took my time with the chest, where the pattern erupted into a maze of twists and turns. Methodically, I captured every impression of it on his skin, in a ritual that summoned no demons.

 

Niko did not move or say anything, his eyes a glaze of darkness pointed skyward.

 

However, when I reached his hips and touched the hem of his pants, he placed his hand over mine gently.

 

“Jos-na,” no intonation in his voice but a question nonetheless.

 

“Niko,” a quiet plea on my end.

 

Niko breathed in deeply like he was mentally preparing himself for a plunge into cold water. Or off a cliff. He let go of my hand and I took off his pants.

 

The tattoo slid down from his hip to his thigh and then curved around to reappear by his knee. I resumed my touch, softer and slower than before. Niko’s skin was drying off fast against the rising wind. I was vaguely aware of the light dimming around us.

 

When I reached his inner thigh, I heard Niko suck in a breath. He then exhaled and went back to his regular, steady breathing. I halted my touch and observed his face. His eyes were closed now, eyebrows furrowed slightly. A mask of concentration. He was meditating.

 

Somehow that irked me. I saw him tether on the edge of losing control. My hands were doing that to him. And I wanted him to lose it.

 

I replaced the touch of my fingers with the pressure of my lips.

 

He tasted of seawater and wind, and everything else unfamiliar and beautiful that comprised this place.

 

His hands reached out to my head, fingers intertwining with my hair and he moaned, so quietly I wouldn’t have caught it if I wasn’t listening for it, _counting_ on it.

 

I kissed him, retracing my steps - back to his hipbones, back to his stomach and lower, along the trail of curly, dark hair. Niko shivered, his moans snarled in rapid breaths.

 

I stroked his erection. Tentatively at first, but firmer with each pull, my lips never leaving the domain of his lower stomach, tongue sweeping in circles, and teeth sinking into his skin just a bit. Just so he really felt it.

 

He came with his head arched back and his hands digging into sand.

 

I was half-tempted to lick off the come off him, but then I didn’t know what he would think of that.

 

I had no idea what he would think about any of this.

 

I picked up tracing the tattoo with my fingers where I left off by his thigh. A rather sensitive spot for him, from my recent observations.  Maybe for other people too. But other people didn’t matter.

 

Niko made a sort of strangled sound as my fingers brushed his toes.

 

It took me a moment to realize that he was laughing. I am not sure I’ve heard him laugh since I was ten years old.

 

“I don’t think anyone’s ever touched me there before,” he said.

 

“Oh.” I wondered if he only meant the toes. “I didn’t plan for any of this to happen.”

 

And I didn’t know why I sounded sorry about it.

 

Shouldn’t he be the one touching me and apologising for it?

 

Clearly, he _wants_ me. Just like _Evan_. Just like...

 

“Does it matter if you did or didn’t? It happened,” Niko said, getting up. He walked away towards the water.

 

I watched his silhouette, dark against a single stroke of orange across purple skies, and anger churned in me like lava.

 

When he came back he was drenched again. He picked up his robe but stopped before he put it on.

 

“What’s wrong, _s’tyna_?” he must have read everything on my face because he reached out to touch it.

 

“That’s not how it works,” I shook my head, hoping my body language would distract him from some of the unbridled emotion in my voice, “You can’t be the Warboy and have a _s’tyna_. Have _me_.”

 

“I don’t have to have you for you to always have a place in my heart. You know this,” his voice quiet, strained.  “Don’t be a child.”  And then he wrapped me in an embrace that cut me off from the rest of the world.

 

***

 

We stayed like that until nightfall.

 

The night was clear and the sky was dotted with stars. It was so dark where we were, it was like we were in another dimension, like we didn’t exist. It was more terrifying than anything I’ve seen in space. But Niko was at peace, I could feel it in his heartbeat.

 

I thought that maybe I could get used to this too - the stars above, the darkness made complete with Niko’s touch.

 

But it was a silly notion, like many of that day. None of this could last. All it would take to dispel this mirage is another day. Just time.

 

But I also learned that it was always like that with things you desired or loved. They always stayed somewhere in the distance, out of reach.

 

And somehow then, it was alright. As long as it was him waiting for me on the horizon.

 


End file.
